Feels like yesterday. #100daysofblogging #Day19

The following is 2 verses I wrote recently, dedicated to my brother Tim Skinner and his son Connor Hart, who were taken from us in a tragic accident 1 year ago tomorrow.

few years ago I wrote a song for my bro
had a different message, a very different flow
there was no way then, that I could have known,
I’d never see him again and I was feeling hurt so

I wrote a little song demanding he call me
half my life had passed and I was being haunted,
waking up tearing my heart out in the morning
started as a teen, now I couldn’t ignore it.

dream he was back, wake up he’s gone again
subconscious thought trying to find a way to mend
scars from a past I was barely a part of,
wanted a change but had nowhere to start from

found a way to get a message to you,
but all you had to say is there’s nothing I can do
spoke with your girl and did a few sums
was then I found out about your four year old son

four year old son I found out about on Facebook
cutest little kid with a cheeky little look,
had the skinner chin, younger face of Tim
one single glance revealed the nature of kin

guess I’d hoped Tim you’d open up to me
invite me for a beer, maybe we could speak
hadn’t heard your voice since I was a teen,
and I wanted you to meet the adult version of me

wanted to meet your lady, you to meet my wife,
wanted to play a part in your sons life
but suddenly then, the worst turn of luck
fishing with your son when tragedy struck;

unseen wave came up under the rocks,
swept you off of your feet, both of your lives lost
hardest year through which I have ever been,
the year monther nature took you both permanently.

Catching ZzZ’s (the NEED for sleep) #100DaysOfBlogging #Day4

SleeepySo this is a little bit of a different post to the first 3, because it’s about something we all love! Sleeeeeeeeep! Most of us don’t get enough of it, I sure as hell don’t. I wish I did. And apparently it’s actually really important to get enough sleep.

We all know that our body recovers while we sleep, but did you know that while we sleep our brain is also cleansed of toxins? Or that connections between brain-cells are produced while we sleep, which improve our memory storage and retrieval?

I’ve been noticing more and more as I get older the importance of sleep. I try make sure to ‘catch up’ on any sleep I miss out on, but it usually doesn’t happen. I’m a busy person, and I’ve always had a bad habit of neglecting sleep. Continue reading Catching ZzZ’s (the NEED for sleep) #100DaysOfBlogging #Day4

A New Year – (2013, the year that was).

At the end of each year, like many others I’ve always enjoyed looking back at the year that was and making predictions and plans for how what the next year will be. The end of 2013 was no exception, but I felt a strong need to finish writing and sorting photos for my post “Logging in WA’s South West” before I wrote this post.

For me, 2013 was a year of much personal and professional progress, but also a year of serious emotional ups and downs and mental health challenges like I had never experienced before. I started the year out on the streets of New York, inebriated by too much top-shelf alcohol consumed while watching comedy to bring in the new year at the Gotham Comedy Club. The hectic nature of New York city on New Years Eve was an accurate omen for how the rest of 2013 would play out, over-crowded and full-on.

My story for 2013 is one of a year not for the feint of heart. Continue reading A New Year – (2013, the year that was).

Dealing with death (and other wonderful thoughts)

I gave the title a little colour, but this really is a post about dealing with death. Recently I have had reason to think a lot about death, though it has never really been far from my mind in recent years.

When I was about 12 one of my favourite uncles died, then my best friends father (my basketball coach) during my final year of high school. There was a break then, for 6 longs years until I lost 2 of my friends from high school in just 2 years, both of them best friends, both of them to suicide. Around the same time my grandfather, after receiving a lung transplant and living an extra year and then some, succumbed to emphysema.

These deaths all register as major events in my life and all came with various degrees of grief and resulting personality shifts. But the impact of those was dwarfed by what I experienced when my 19 year old cousin Jessica Rose Joss was taken away from us in a car accident. That one is still hard to even talk about. She was so young and full of energy and life and for that to be extinguished is heartbreaking.

And I guess that’s what I am getting at here. Dealing with death is heartbreaking. Everyone has a different way of dealing with it and none of them are particularly pretty. Continue reading Dealing with death (and other wonderful thoughts)

Why am I here?

Why am I here?

A question we all come to ask ourselves from one time to another. It can be brought on by many things, from a near-miss in your car to a boring day at work. It can also mean a lot of things. Why am I here could be a question about why you are alive. It could also be a question about why you decided to take a certain path in life. In this moment of time the question is, for me, about why I am writing this blog.

What is my purpose here? Why do I feel compelled to put my thoughts out in long form for everyone to see? What do I hope to achieve? Or is it just for the release of getting my thoughts out in front of myself, and if that is the case then why choose to do it in public?

Certainly it’s about the release to some extent. There is too much going on in my head at times and it needs to be taken out, stored away somewhere else to make room for new thoughts, ideas or information. But it is much more than just that.

I feel I have a need and indeed a responsibility to write about the things I learn, the wisdoms uncovered and the failures too. We are living in a world now, where we are involved in constant communication, but one in which the communication is often of little value or consequence. We are too oft caught up in unimportant discussions about issues of little consequence while major social, political, economic and especially personal issues are hidden or avoided. It has always been my role in life to break these taboos.

Continue reading Why am I here?